Dear Author Diary,
This will be my new diary; a story of life as an indie author trying to make a living and trying to put meals on my plate…instead of just crumbs. Currently, there are excerpts of the “Diary of An Author” released and more entries to come. I know. When my first book, Crystal Dreams Book One, released on April 2016. I’ve said that this diary was going to be released in 2017…Then 2018….But writing this diary for a few years now, I’ve started re-re-writing my first novel in 2015.[…] so pushing this diary off to release at its best is my point. I don’t want to release something no one wants to read.
It took me twenty years to write and complete Crystal Dreams Book 1. It will more than likely take a little bit of time to write “The Diary of an Author,” to get it edited, and to release it to the world.[…] hopefully…
As most readers know, I was only (almost) 8 years old in the summer of 1997 when I came across something called “writing”. I started out writing as a coping mechanism to escape the childhood I had. After all, my mom blamed me for being born a girl (was not my fault – I didn’t ask to be born), my brothers hated me for looking like I was more “American” than Asian (brown hair and all), and my dad….He never talked to me except the 4 times in my life where he told me, “You need to listen to your mom more.” That’s my childhood. Did I mention the day-ins and day-outs of being beaten? My 10 years (that I know of) is riddled with violence. I only thought of being a kind person because of some heroine girl on television named Sailor Moon. I wanted to grow up to be her and save the world from the violence I know existed too well. Turns out, I wasn’t out to save the world. I was only here to stand on my own feet and save myself.[…]
When I was three years old, my first memory, I saw my dad hit my mom, and my dad was sent away. To this day, I still don’t know where he went. Then he came back less than a day later. No one ever talks about my first memory as a child. No one ever talks about my childhood and the truth inside it: physical abuse, verbal hatred, demeaning me, belittling me, and telling me how I’m fat starting from when I was only four years old. Honestly, how can a little four year old Asian girl, who looks more Caucasian than Asian, be considered “fat”? Please explain that to me.[…]
While my dearest friend’s memory is of watching heroines fight back guys on T.V., I lived that heroine life trying to fight bad guys…in real life; my family. My whole childhood had been a soap opera (that’s what my friend, Chi, said). I know this “Diary of an Author” is a very personal and private thing to write-living life in poverty, living on the streets, trying to get and keep food on my plate and hoping the rain doesn’t get through the leaky roof onto my bedroom floor.
With all the bad things being said about authors and why we’re actually writing-for money, for attention, for fame, for everything except enjoyment-I think it’s about time someone ought to the set the record straight. I know. Truth doesn’t go as far now-a-days as it did 30 years ago. Lies spread like fire as if life is wood after a drought, but people need to know, life as an author is not all sunny days and fun times autographing books. My life, anyway, has only been one bad crying night after another begging for food and hoping for enough this month so I don’t spend next month sleeping on the streets. Again. Turns out, the truth hurts, and I’m about to write every moment of it….From the eyes of an author through the “Diary of an Author”…..
DIARY OF AN AUTHOR